"Eternally Yours" with Haleluya Hailu

Written and Photographed by Anthony "Tone" Bailey (@_seeyoutmrw)

On a breezy, cloudy day just a couple hours before their set at The Baby G for NXNE in Toronto, I sat down with alternative pop artist Haleluya Hailu. Through our conversation we broke down some tracks from Hailu’s latest EP eternally yours, the mysticism of a Walmart in B.C., and the vulnerabilities of finding your voice through music. In true Toronto fashion, we started our talk bemoaning about how long it takes to commute to anywhere in the city.

HALELUYA HAILU

People always talk about Vancouver drivers, but I think Toronto is really, really coming for our game right now. I saw like two people try and turn left on a red.

TONE BAILEY

Yep.

HALELUYA

Only one of them made it without somehow not hitting, like, you know, the little kid running across. And then the other one was stuck like in the middle of the road somehow blocking both street cars.

TONE

You've been initiated. Welcome.

HALELUYA

Wow. I love Toronto.

TONE

How many times have you been here to perform or just hang out?

HALELUYA

This is my fourth trip here. My first time over to Toronto, I was really lucky I got to play Honey Jam and that was an incredible experience.It's like a women-in-music kind of incubator thing. I only was able to make it for the showcase. But part of the program is they do a bunch of workshops and artist development things. And then the two times, other than that, I played an acoustic show where I previewed my EP. I was like, ahhhh! I played a full band show both at the Burdock, which is a really cute spot. Great beer.

TONE

Congrats on the EP though! I was listening to it on the way down here, and I put it on repeat a couple times. It's a solid project from top to bottom.

Who were your band mates on the project?

HALELUYA

The project was almost entirely recorded with just the two producers I worked with. I mostly co-wrote with Quinn Pickering, who's a long time friend of mine, and when I started doing music, he was like, “yo, I'm a producer, let’s write together.”And so we started working together then. And when I signed to 6 0 4, I was introduced to Jared Manierka who produced a couple of the songs there. And they're both multi- instrumented virtuoso types. So they covered a lot of the bass, guitar, and drums on those and, you know, some light keys.It was one of my first times like co-writing with people. And I think it was a journey and understanding ofwhen to let go of certain things and like how to truly be like a collaborator.Sometimes you write a line and your co-writer will go “try harder” and it'll work out. And sometimes your co-writer will be like, “I prefer this idea.” And sometimes you go, “no, this idea has to stick here.” So it’s finding a good in between of that.

TONE

Okay, so pinball. I'm listening to the song and this feels like what every relationship in your early twenties where you're like… “it's fine.” But it’s not!

HALELUYA

You got it! I'm always in this thing where whenever I play a show or whenever I put out a song, I'm like, I can't believe anybody listens to this. It's like, it's unreal, you know?

TONE

Yeah, this was giving melancholic R&B, on self-destruct mode. And pinball, is that something that you grew up playing at all?

HALELUYA

Well, no. I got a text from somebody after it was featured on a Spotify playlist thing. And it was somebody I knew from third grade and they were pinball fanatic. They're like, “I didn't know you played, what's your favorite system?” I was like, “I actually never played yo.” And I mean, it's fun. Like there's a lot of great arcade bars in Vancouver where I've thought “My God, this is fun.”

TONE

Y'all still have arcade bars?

HALELUYA

Yeah, they're really cool. I really hope that they all stick around, man.

But it came from one of my friend's roommates. He said “oh my God, like I have so much homework to do. My brain is a game of pinball I'm losing right now.” And it was something he said in passing that really stuck with me. I very often find myself in situations where I shouldn't have my iPhone notes out.

I'll overhear conversations or I'll be looking at your phone like on the bus being like, “What the hell is this guy? What? What are you texting your girlfriend, man?” Like, you have to find inspiration in these weird spots in life.

TONE

Manic Pixie Pacifist, though? The title alone got my interest.
Are you in support of that archetype or not really?

HALELUYA

It just came from a point in my life where I felt like I was the bright colored hair girl with piercings and tattoos. And I would very often find myself involved with these men who were bored with their life or needed somebody to “fix them.” Or “Yeah, damn, like, she's gonna ruin my life.”

But I was like, I am very not that. I'm a very interesting person and I'm also a pushover. It's something I've worked on a lot in therapy. I very much know now like, “Hey, you can't be mean to me.” I am standing up for myself.

TONE

You better! The song definitely sounds like a lead character releasing their destructive habits. That seems to be like a theme throughout all of your work in this EP. Like, “I want to be better. I don't know the steps, but I'm working on it.”

HALELUYA

You definitely got the project. Like you understood what I was trying to lay down. I grew up in the suburbs in Vancouver and finished high school in the pandemic. And I always wanted to go to school in the States. But I re-calibrated and ended up going to school in Nelson, BC.

Lots of cool folks have come out of it, but it was extremely isolated because it was still the tail end of the pandemic. It was my first time leaving home like that. It's not like you're moving to a big city with a lot of culture.

So I spent a lot of time in my dorm. It was the first time in my life where I had to learn how to be alone with my thoughts for long periods of time. From 2021 to 2023.

It was a really fun time 'cause I was doing a lot of the writing in between my classes. The tune walmart is a songwriting class, like assignment of mine. It sounds very different than the demo.
The demo is like a jangly acoustic guitar and has this like, really upbeat little bassline. You know, like I got good feedback. It's a wordy song. And I took it to Jared and I was like, “this isn't the right energy. Like this is supposed to be depressing.”

TONE

You really had the depressing lyrics and the upbeat tempo.

HALELUYA

It was like some tambourine s**t. It sounded like a Beatles song at that point.

TONE

Was walmart inspired by pandemic shopping?

HALELUYA

When I was 18 in Nelson, there was like a whole lot of nothing to do. And the place that was open, the latest and provided the most entertainment was the Walmart. My dad, he's an older African guy and we were buying stuff from my dorm and he was like, “why the hell did they put a Walmart here?” It's like right beside the most picturesque beautiful lake you've seen in your entire life.

And later on, I think in that year, I ended up going on a date with this French guy and he was like, “Haleluya, I want to show you a place.” And I was like, “okay, like let's go.” He was like, “it has a beautiful view. It'll be so much fun.” And it was just a cliff overlooking the Walmart.

TONE

Man said, “I know a place,” and it's the Walmart.

HALELUYA

I think the lyric is like “on the rooftop of a Walmart,” but it's like, oh, this is a lot uglier view. And it was just inspired by this kind of dread of something feels off. It felt like I was just kind of dragging along.
I'd get random arts and craft supplies. I made friendship bracelets. I crocheted, I painted, I bought a coloring book.

TONE

It sounds like you were trying to express yourself through other means that gave you joy.

HALELUYA

I love therapy. Everybody should do it. And I remember like my therapist at the time who was an incredible woman, would always suggest something new to do.
I'd be like, there's no way that'll make me feel happier. And then I'd walk for 30 minutes a day and I'd be like, “oh, why is this making me feel better?” It's that simple.

TONE

Can we talk about postal code? This might be my favorite song off the EP. What was it like crafting that? What was the story behind that?

HALELUYA

That was the longest. For context, we started writing USELESS when I was 17. There's a demo of it on my laptop called Eggs and Cheese.

Quinn sent me the guitar, like the [mimics bassline]. And I started writing, a breakup song to somebody that I had a really, really bad situationship with.
And as time went on, I realized that this isn't what this song is supposed to be. Sometimes as you're writing, the reason why maybe this verse doesn't feel right is because it isn't.
Eventually there was this lightning in the bottle moment where I heard the hook in my head and turned into this.

It's about not knowing where you're supposed to be. There's a lot of lyrics in there that are very Nelson-core.
I think we wrote that right before I came to Toronto for the first time. So it was manifesting. I wanted to find the perfect fit pair of thrifted cowboy boots, and I ended up finding 'em like two weeks later.

TONE

Beautiful.

HALELUYA

But I wrote [postal code] last for the EP. It' very reminiscent of the time when I was writing it thinking “I'm not gonna miss Nelson.” But I do miss that place. But it was an understanding of this isn't my place forever. It is a place that I was supposed to be for a little bit to figure out something about myself. And I'm still figuring out where I'm supposed to live and exist as an artist, but every time I play it, it's like one of those tunes where I'm like, “I think I did a good job” and I feel like I get the most response from people about it.

TONE

You blame the government for your state of mind to your therapist. How much responsibility do you feel to be real about injustices happening in the world?

HALELUYA

There is like so much weight that gets put on, I think Black women on everything. Especially when I was living in Nelson, it was like, “guys, our woke friend is here.” It's like, what do you mean? I haven't even said anything. Is it just because I'm Black?

It is just one of those things. And existing as a Black woman making alt pop that's kind of adjacent to, in Vancouver, the scene is very much dominated by indie rock, four white guys with guitars. There is a feeling of wanting to in a way prove your blackness uh, to always educate other people. And on top of that, you're worrying for everybody around you in your community.

And although it's like a cheeky lyric in a tune, there's so many ways, that I think specifically black artists on the West Coast are not supported well enough by the industry.

I recently was lucky to receive a black musician award from SoCan. And it's the first year that I knew West Coast artist and won.

TONE

Wow.

HALELUYA

Me and an amazing artist named Bukola. She's so good. In past years, the only people that I've ever won are people from Toronto and Montreal. It is like a very different world on the West coast, specifically in BC.There are so many Black artists who make good Black art and are relegated to Black History Month shows. And on top of that we have to exist in a place that is filled with, injustices, said injustices are very loud, but people speak about quietly.

TONE

Thank you for that. And what is something that you hope people can take away from this EP?

HALELUYA

What is the meme? “All women do born after 1999 is be Bisexual, eat Hot Chip and lie.” That's what I'm saying, like “I need phone charger.” That's that.

Be able to sit down and just let the quiet exist. Yeah. I have a very loud inner voice all the time and I've tried meditation and all that kind of stuff. My partner describes meditation as, you've probably heard this, less about trying to quiet that voice and just being comfortable with it speaking and voicing its concern.

BACK